Here I go again!

The good news is that I know what it feels like to be lean(ish), healthy and fit. And I know that it can be done, because I've done it before. The bad news is that it's easy to waste a lot of time on recriminations and negative self-talk for letting myself gain so much weight after *swearing* that I'd never be fat again.

Ah well. I'm finally making progress on just accepting that I am where I am these days. An ex-boyfriend of mine from a million years ago used to get frustrated hearing me kvetch about my weight. He would finally crack and say, "I think you're hot, but if it bothers you that much, why don't you just lose the damn weight?!". Of course, that was infuriating at the time, but that's kind of where my head's at now: with the energy I've spent on freaking out about my flab, I probably could have conquered an empire. Not that I'm much of an imperialist; I'm just sayin'.

And I really need to give myself more credit. Ten years ago I was a recent college grad, severely depressed, totally directionless, very ill, and with little hope that things would ever be better. Since then I've found my true calling, had an amazing labor relations career, finished my masters, (nearly) finished my JD, adopted two beautiful pups, travelled, moved to three different cities, forged amazing friendships, found amazing loves, discovered my inner athlete. . . I should spend a little more time appreciating all that I've done and a little less time berating myself for going up 3 pants sizes.

So that's the project, for now. That and some lard-busting. ;)